Joy At The Fair
We probably should have stayed home on Sunday afternoon. Rich and I were tired, the house was in chaos, and it was hot outside. But earlier in the week we’d mentioned the possibility of visiting the county fair to Isaac and he couldn’t stop talking about seeing the farm animals. So we left the loads of laundry and piles of toys on the floor and headed out.
August has been a hard month. Isaac was sick, Rich and I have been busy with work, and we are really feeling the past year of interrupted sleep. The Brock’s are feeling worn out.
Parent-of-small-kids-tired is something you can’t explain to a non-parent. I’m constantly amazed at how much time and energy small children demand. So often at the end of the day I’m completely exhausted and have very little progress to show for it. I feel like a ball bouncing around a closed room; I’m perpetually in motion but never moving forward.
Some days are completely defeating and I wish I could tap out for a few hours. Or maybe call in sick and spend the day laying in bed sipping tea and watching movies. When I’m feeling defeated, I lose my joy. I start thinking about this phase of mothering small children as a season to get through rather than a time to be cherished. I get focused on the endless tasks of motherhood that I forget to pause and spend time enjoying my children. I forget to really listen to my baby laugh and give her excess cuddles when she cries. I forget to marvel at the creativity of my preschooler as he creates a story with his wooden trains. I hate feeling that way and I know it’s not how I want to live.
Sometimes as parents we all need a little reset. A break from the routine of getting things done and a few hours to laugh, make memories, and just enjoy the blessing of being a family. We need to be reminded that even when life feels hard, it is still so, so, good.
Sometimes you just need to walk around the county fair and watch your son shriek with delight when he pets a baby goat. Or take your daughter on a carousel ride for the first time. Or squeeze your husband’s hand while he drives your minivan.
Joy is all around us waiting to be found. Lord, I pray for the eyes and the strength to see it.